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TINK
Member
ok... i know this was someone we know.... i can guarantee it....

(724): also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
 
PDub
Member
Post from TINKok... i know this was someone we know.... i can guarantee it....

(724): also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
you remember that time... oh nm
 
"Music in the soul can be heard by the universe."
holly
Premium Member
(412) I'm tryin to get my friend to come. she's bein a snot
(412-1) stick a ketchup bottle up her ass
(412) I don't have one in reach
(412-1) well you better find one


i recognize this... lmao.
 
PDub
Member
Post from holly(412) I'm tryin to get my friend to come. she's bein a snot
(412-1) stick a ketchup bottle up her ass
(412) I don't have one in reach
(412-1) well you better find one


i recognize this... lmao.
haha ya dude you should have found a ketchup bottle
 
"Music in the soul can be heard by the universe."
poptart
Member
Post from holly(412) I'm tryin to get my friend to come. she's bein a snot
(412-1) stick a ketchup bottle up her ass
(412) I don't have one in reach
(412-1) well you better find one


i recognize this... lmao.
The use of the word 'snot' gave this one away!
 
"And if I was a ghost and came back when u smoked me id rape u" -Flatbed
SARA
Moderator
Post from TINKok... i know this was someone we know.... i can guarantee it....

(724): also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
god that sounds so familiar.
 
holly
Premium Member
Post from poptartThe use of the word 'snot' gave this one away!
wly?
 
BOINGTHUMP
Premium Member
Post from TINKok... i know this was someone we know.... i can guarantee it....

(724): also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
I have sent this text before or one very close to it.  I'm also a 724 number. I really don't know if this is me or not though.

That bothers me a lot.
 
Also some things just shouldnt be shared with the general population...or even on a message board...definately not here on Lolli.
danish6259
Member
(724): I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
(724): That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling

This site is addictive.
 
MiaaGlow
Member
Post from danish6259(724): I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
(724): That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling

This site is addictive.
haha if i got a text like that id laugh all fucking day
 
"Cameras ready, prepare to flash..."
MiaaGlow
Member
(281): How do you jack off and text at the same time?
(1-281): On my iPhone they have an app for that
 
"Cameras ready, prepare to flash..."
MiaaGlow
Member
i keep postin shit but im crackin up.

(434): why are there goldfish crackers all over my bed?
(540): you decided you wanted to name them & keep them as pets.
-------------------
(570): why did i make a hit list last night containing only McDonalds?
(1-570): you tried to order a magarita mcflurry and when they said they didnt make those you tried to call 911
----------------
(512): i just sat at a stop sign for 10 minutes waiting for it to turn green. i need to STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT.

(i kid you not, i have done this)
---------------------
(818): Jake died.
(310): WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
(818): Oops typo. Jake cried.
----------------------
(305): Imagine two people making love on top of a unicorn . . . my life is the opposite of that.
-----------------


these people are ridiculous.  you couldnt pay me to come up with half of this shit
 
"Cameras ready, prepare to flash..."
PDub
Member
lol... that margarita mcflurry one is hilarious. I was drunk enough in november that I tried to call 911 (no idea why) and missed... luckily.

its not necessarilly coming up with shit like this that is a challenge, but having the ballz to share it. I shared some crazy ones, unfortunately there are worse that just ... can't be shown... haha *ahem*
 
"Music in the soul can be heard by the universe."
SARA
Moderator
(708): i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.



lol
 
pablo814
Premium Member
(845): I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
 
"Honey, I want to do something, we never do anything!" "We are doing something. I'm watching the game and eating a sandwich, and you are making me another sandwich!"
TINK
Member
i really need to start saving my good texts... my boy matthew comes up with some good shit
 
DjRM
Member
(347): I'm at breakfast still drunk holding a blow up parrot

epic night
 
FreakLove
Member
(314): So I went on a date with this girl...and whos our waitress? My girlfriend got a second job she didn't tell me about to afford my bday present.



ha



(514): I left the party when things started to get crazy... and when I say crazy I mean: there was puke on the carpet, Evan was passed out behind a plant, Mary was making out with her ex while her present bf was making out with Nancy. Not to mention that someone fisted the wall. Also - someone is sleeping on your lawn - they might be dead, I didn't check. Later.


lol


(262): Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
 
Lolli is a hooker
PDub
Member
omg look at this one

(954): Your an asshole
(1-954): Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
(954): My point exactly
 
"Music in the soul can be heard by the universe."
DjRM
Member
I'll be watchin out for this chic

(313): At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
 
PDub
Member
(412) my boat is ready in 2 weeks k
(1-412) zomg I got flippie floppies!!!
(412) what a coincidence, I have bluntz

^ fuckin sweeeeet
 
"Music in the soul can be heard by the universe."
BOINGTHUMP
Premium Member
(907): I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.


Totally going to use this at a later date. Pure genius.
 
Also some things just shouldnt be shared with the general population...or even on a message board...definately not here on Lolli.
Sweecent
Member

(646): I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.


(210): How crunk are you?
(713): I'm a Tom Selleck. Zero being Tipper Gore and max being the Bush twins
 
djgraph
Member
Post from PDubomg look at this one

(954): Your an asshole
(1-954): Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
(954): My point exactly
who is putting my texts on there

fess up
 
i actually miss netic. w/e on all of you
MiaaGlow
Member
im posting more, im addicted

(801): see... this is why i put birth control in all my friends drinks
(1-801): wait.... you do what?
---------------------------------------------------
(631): I am not drunk. I will recite the pledge.
(401): I don't want you to recite the pledge!
(631): Pledge alligien to america to united states of america
--------------------------------------------------
(334): Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.  
(i totally sent a similar text to someone the other day)
-----------------------------------------------------
(317): I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
-----------------------------------------------------
 
"Cameras ready, prepare to flash..."
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